Strategy of The Abductor

Strategy of the Abductor
Denial of Access

The Strategy of Liudmila

Denied Access to my Daughter’s

Liudmila’s Strategy – How she cuts me off from our children
 

Strategy of the Abductor

1. Creating a Language Barrier:

Liudmila refuses me to pay for the language classes for my children so that they will not be able to talk to me. As we all know, language is the key to any communication. Unfortunately, I do not speak Russian (only a very few words).

So, since my children’s abduction in 2017, they have been isolated from me, unable and not allowed to exercise and practice the Swedish and Greek languages. Ultimately, my daughters forgot how to speak Greek and Swedish. Anthie’ still remembers some Greek but not enough for regular, meaningful communication through the phone.

I offered many times to Liudmila that I would find a private language teacher in Minsk (which I did) and pay for the language classes for our children so they could maintain the Greek and Swedish language. Still, she continually refuses to do this without any logical explanation. I hope that you understand that this is ridiculous. As such, Liudmila managed not only to remove our children from me geographically, but also through the main communication channel, through the language!

Of course, the possibility of seeing my kids via Skype or VIBER regularly equals the possibility of me flying to the Moon. However, Liudmila would never in her life bother to arrange a regular Skype call; It is not in HER interest!

Furthermore, even if my daughters and I ever saw each other via Skype, we could only use sign language due to the language barrier already created. As you can imagine, this is an extremely frustrating situation for a left-behind parent and the children.

I reached the peak of my frustration in June 2019 when Anthie could not understand what I was trying to tell her over the phone. She, therefore, told me,“Daddy, I do not understand”, and she hung up the phone on me. Let us not forget that my daughters are still small, and of course, they do not entirely understand what is going on with their lives. So when Anthie’ hung up the phone, I was devastated. 

When you are dealing with a non-cooperative, self-centered, manipulative Abductor, they will make sure to harm you as much as possible. That is what Liudmila does, and she tries to minimize my presence in my daughters’ life in any possible way.

I want to note that I find it sad when any mother denies enhanced education for her children. If my daughters can speak more languages fluently, this would help them further in their own lives and make them more competitive in their future careers. But unfortunately, Liudmila does not think that far or deep because she focuses on her goal to erase me from my daughters’ lives completely.

2. Telling everyone that I do not care about our children and that I do not show any interest in their lives is an outrageous and disgusting lie:

Dear Audience, if this had ever been true, you would not now be on this website reading this. From the very beginning of the abduction, I fought for my children. That can easily be proven through court documents and thousands of emails sent out to various institutions, churches, organizations, and media worldwide. I want to remind Liudmila of the following:

Dear Liudmila,

#  After my personal experience with you, I concluded that the only reason why you wanted to have children was to satisfy your own ambitions– you were approaching a critical physical age for a woman to get kids, and having them was purely a move for your own self-validation – to have kids as your personal trophy, and also to try to manipulate me through them, but nothing else:

#  It was YOU who planned this abduction well in advance with your friend Mariya Khatsanovska by also using (or misusing) the Russian Orthodox Church, and interestingly, just a couple of days after the kidnapping, you immediately filed for alimony, knowing precisely what to do and how to do while not even bothering to contact me to explain where you or the kids are at all:

#  It was YOU who abducted our children and traumatized them for the rest of their lives because YOU wanted to live the way YOU wanted:

#  It is YOU who cut them off from me, not answering my calls, ignoring my text messages, responding with huge delays or never:

#  It was YOU who, this way, robbed our daughters of their father in their everyday lives, thinking that this is normal, just because YOU never had any healthy relationship with your father – please search on the internet how the absence of a father figure impact daughters’ lives and also please search how parental abductions traumatize the children – you are basically only continuing transposing your trauma on our daughters making them pay for your childhood traumas:

#  It is YOU who totally refuses any proposals from my side to pay for language classes for our daughters to ensure they are not able to talk to me because you view my phone calls as some kind of a threat – you want the kids to BELONG to you because, in your mind, they are objects and not human beings having their own rights:

#  It was YOU who never told me which school Anthie’ would attend, although I offered you to pay so she could attend an excellent private school in Minsk  – you never tell me anything about our kids, and I had to get this information through Belarusian authorities (after five months) only to learn that you put Anthie’ to a Monastery school (!) without any consultation with me or asking me anything:

#  It is YOU who does not keep me informed about our daughters’ health, and I only learned by coincidence that Alexandra and Anthie’ was hospitalized with Corona infection:

#  It is YOU who engages even your relatives like your sister to stand by my daughters dictating to them what to answer me or how to answer when, once a year, my call is finally answered by Anthie’ who struggles to understand me:

#  It is YOU who spreads lies about me, saying I do not care about our children or that I refused to marry you to justify yourself. Sorry Liudmila, but it was you who refused to undersign a prenuptial agreement. I was not reluctant to marry you, although my intuition told me that something was not right in your soul.

What is really interesting here is the fact that the Abductor is trying to convince everyone that she is actually – a victim and the left-behind parent a monster.

This is quite a common strategy of the Abductors, to make sure that everyone feels sorry for them and helps them. You could easily fall for this if you ever talked to Liudmila, as she speaks gently and responds thoughtfully to various questions. 

Then, she will paint herself as Mother Theresa. Rolling her “innocent” eyes, telling people how sorry she even feels for me (!!!), and, after listening to this nicely served Bull Shit, you start feeling sorry for her!

And that’s the goal, to spin her story the way to present herself as a victim. That’s what she does, and only people knowing the details and cold facts will be able to see through this.

As I previously mentioned, my ex-partner visited a psychologist in Sweden several years before the abduction. Unfortunately, her behavior is consistent with a combination of a narcissistic and borderline personality.

Citation:

Gaslighting is a technique abusers use to convince you that your perception of the abuse is inaccurate. During the devaluation and discard phases, the narcissist will often invalidate and criticize your emotions and displace any blame of their abuse as your fault.

Narcissist’s smear campaign is used to accomplish three things:

a) it depicts you as the Abuser or unstable person and deflects your accusations of abuse:

b) it provokes you into responding, thus proving your instability to others when trying to argue their depiction of you; and 

c) serves as a hoovering technique in which the narcissist seeks to pull you back into the trauma of the relationship as you struggle to reconcile the rumors about you with who you actually are by speaking out against the accusations”.

Source: 

5 Powerful Ways Abusive Narcissists Manipulate You

3. Bringing strangers to the meetings and making me pay for them. You are going to love this one. Here is how this works:

The Abductors are well aware that they committed a crime. However, they are actually scared that exactly the same thing they did to you will happen to them; they are paranoid that the left-behind parent will attempt to re-abduct the children. Please note the sick logic – in their minds, they are entitled to abduct the children, but for some reason, they totally don’t want the same thing to happen to them.

That is almost funny because the Abductors brain is telling them approximately the following:

LIUDMILA IS ENTITLED TO ABDUCT THE CHILDREN BECAUSE
SHE IS ALWAYS RIGHT, AND SHE CAN DO THAT!

But, what’s interesting is that the Abductor still understands that they are wrong somewhere inside their scull. They know that what they did is a crime with consequences at the end of the day. But, their genuine fear is to lose control; of course, if the left-behind parent re-abducts the child/children, suddenly, the Abductors are left with nothing to blackmail you.

Let’s not forget that the main pleasure Liudmila gets is to create pressure on me through the children.

That is the only leverage she has. So, what does Liudmila do? Liudmila ask’s her friends to join the very few meetings since 2017 I was able to attend with my children for a couple of hours. The last time I met with my children was in June 2019, and the last time I was allowed to talk with my children by phone was in early June 2021.

That is how it happened several times; I arrived at a restaurant or café, and here we go, without any prior notice, a stranger is there with Liudmila and the kids, watching me the whole time. And not only that.

That is not only insulting but, Liudmila and her friends have the nerve to make me pay for these strangers’ consumption at the restaurant. Isn’t this ridiculous – I am supposed to pay a stranger to watch me? Don’t you love this absurdity?

You, the left-behind parent, are being treated as a SUSPECT who has been robbed of your children and mocked by the Potemkin-like judicial system of Belarus.

4. Using their relatives and friends to control and brainwash abducted children further:

In Liudmila’s case, her sister and religious friends would be this. While Liudmila and her sister are not really too close, they are close enough to damage my daughters even more by joining their forces and brainwashing my children from all possible angles.

As such, the very few times I connected with my daughter Anthie’ through the phone (after many attempts, humiliating myself, asking, etc.), Liudmila’s sister stood by Anthie, telling her how to answer. Liudmila does the same thing when she is at home; she directs Anthie’ on how to answer me.

That is total control of every second I can use when talking to my children. That again shows how paranoid Abductors are because they feel scared to give children the freedom to express themselves even over the phone. I do not know whether all the parents in Belarus use this type of heavy censorship on their children, but the sample I’ve got, Liudmila, totally loves doing this.

She loves to control and censor because, again, this is how she gains her sense of “power” (through two small children – how sad!). That is precisely Lukashenko’s method whom she supports (not because she likes him) but because he is covering her ass in the Lawless State of Belarus!

5. Blaming the left-behind parent for everything:

Another strategy Liudmila uses is to blame me for everything in this world. If the kids cried after our meetings (because they missed me) – guess what – it’s MY fault! Not hers, of course, because, let’s not forget – she is an angel, and she never hurt anyone. It is MY fault that the kids were abducted, and it’s also MY fault that, surprise-surprise, they actually miss me! 

What a shocker! HER daughters actually miss their father and cry for him! Wow, Liudmila, what an eye-opening event in your life! And the list goes on.

The Abductor will blame you for everything, be ready for that. They are always the eternal victims, and you will always be presented as an a….hole. That is the plot they follow, and this is what they want everyone to believe.

6. Constantly denying that they deny you access to children:

You keep calling Liudmila’s cell phone, home phone, any phone, asking her, begging, etc., to talk to your kids. Liudmila will, of course, never respond, or, even better: she will, but, only after many days, to drive you desperate – then, when she finally reaches the point of her self-satisfaction, she finally gracefully responds to you, but, just very briefly, giving you empty answers BUT, BUT! Liudmila then saves down her “answers” so that she can tell everyone: Look, look, I DO respond to him! I have proof!

She only forgets to mention a small detail; Liudmila only responds when SHE wants to because she LOVES controlling the situation. She knows that you miss the children, and she loves torturing you with her absent answers. That gives her pleasure, and this is what, in my opinion, matches psychopathic behavior.

Of course, nobody sees how many times I called or how many times I begged. What is crucial for her is to show that she “responds”. The rest is not essential to her or the degenerated advisers she uses, who don’t follow any professional ethics or human morals because their “competence” is derived from their high-ranked contacts with the Belarusian administration and not by possessing competence or knowledge.

The advisers of Liudmila and the corrupt Belarusian authorities, known for their “PARASITIC IDEOLOGY”, are using my children as a blackmailing tool to press me to accept their terms. 

And that is, we want everything from you, but you will get a handful of nothing back! That is called a “Mediation A’la Belarus”! However, this will never happen. 

Dear “Advisers and Public Servants”, I dreamed about sending my children one day abroad for higher and specialized education in the best educational institutions in the world. But, unfortunately, you deprived my children and me of that right. I consider you, together with the rest of the “Primitives” I had to deal with in Belarus, solely responsible for destroying Anthie’s and Alexandra’s lives.

I could continue this list, but I hope these few points gave you a good picture of my situation. The summary is that this is a control game, and this is a total abuse of our daughters and me. And, Liudmila does this because, again – she can! Who in Belarus will be watching her every day to ensure that she respects my rights or our children’s rights? Nobody!

Nobody in Belarus cares about my children, although they know what is happening (Judges, Prosecutors & Public Authorities). Because they also know that Liudmila Trafimovich is one of the few supporters left of the “Corrupt Belarusian System” and a “Putin Phanatic”.

So they leave her to do whatever she wants with them. There is no mechanism for these abusers to be reprimanded, fined, prosecuted, or jailed for their abuse. 

The Abductor and Abuser are protected, while you, the left-behind parent, will not be protected or helped by anyone in the Abductor’s country. Not even in your own country if it happens to be the Sleeping Kingdom of Sweden!

Nicolaos A.A. Cheropoulos
Father of Anthie’ and Alexandra
Stockholm, April 2020
Revised, Oct. 2023
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